Why You Should Stop Apologising as a Cyclist
“Sorry.”
It’s a word many of us use without thinking. Sorry for being slow. Sorry for taking up space. Sorry for asking a question. Sorry for needing a break. Sorry for being ambitious. Sorry for existing a little too loudly.
If you’re a woman in cycling, chances are you’ve apologised for things that never required an apology in the first place. I know I have.
Stopping unnecessary apologies isn’t about becoming rude or dismissive. It’s about recognising your right to be here, to take up space, and to ride with confidence.
Apologising Is Often a Habit, Not a Necessity
Many apologies aren’t responses to mistakes. They’re responses to discomfort.
We apologise when:
- We’re not as fast as we think we “should” be
- We ask for clarification
- We take a rest day
- We prioritise ourselves
- We express an opinion
- We don’t meet an unspoken expectation
In cycling, this shows up all the time. “Sorry, I’m slow today.” “Sorry, I’ll drop off.” “Sorry, I need to eat.” “Sorry, I can’t make the ride.”
But none of those things are wrong. They’re simply human. Over-apologising subtly reinforces the idea that our needs, pace, or presence are inconveniences. Over time, that mindset chips away at confidence.
You Don’t Need to Apologise for Taking Up Space
You belong on the road, the trail, the group ride, the start line, the café stop.
You don’t need to apologise for:
- Riding at your pace
- Learning something new
- Asking questions
- Setting boundaries
- Fuelling properly
- Resting when you need to
- Showing ambition
Cycling isn’t reserved for one type of rider, one speed, one body, or one personality. Confidence isn’t loud. Sometimes it’s simply not apologising for things that aren’t mistakes.
The Difference Between Accountability and Unnecessary Apologies
Stopping unnecessary apologies doesn’t mean avoiding accountability.
There are times when “sorry” matters: if you’ve genuinely hurt someone, made a mistake, or caused harm. Those apologies are meaningful because they’re intentional.
What we’re talking about here is removing apology from moments where it’s being used as social cushioning, where “sorry” replaces confidence, clarity, or self-respect.
A useful check is this: Did I do something wrong, or did I just feel uncomfortable? If it’s the latter, an apology probably isn’t required.
What to Say Instead of “Sorry”
This can feel awkward at first, but it’s powerful.
Instead of:
- “Sorry I’m slow today” → “I’m riding easy today”
- “Sorry for asking” → “Can you clarify this for me?”
- “Sorry I need to stop” → “I need to stop for a moment”
- “Sorry I can’t make it” → “I won’t be able to make it”
These statements are neutral, clear and confident. You’re not asking permission to exist. You’re communicating.
How This Shows Up in Training and Performance
Confidence affects performance more than we often admit.
When you stop apologising unnecessarily, you trust your decisions more. You fuel without guilt, rest without justification, communicate needs clearly, and carry less mental load. That matters. It’s the difference between riding tentatively and riding with presence.
Letting Go of “Sorry” Is a Practice
This isn’t about never apologising again. It’s about becoming aware.
Start by noticing:
- How often you say “sorry”
- What you’re actually apologising for
- Whether an apology is truly needed
Then gently replace it with clarity. You don’t need to correct yourself out loud every time. Just noticing is enough to start shifting the habit.
Final Thoughts
You don’t need to apologise for your pace, your progress, your goals, your needs, or your presence.
Cycling is meant to be empowering. And part of that empowerment is allowing yourself to take up space without apology.
Ride with confidence. Speak with clarity. Save “sorry” for the moments where it truly matters.
— Chloe and the Hosking Bikes Team